Returning from class on Monday all I could think about was a poem I first read way back in my high school Latin class. It’s by an ancient Roman named Catullus.
odi et amo. quare id faciam, fortasse requiris.
nescio, sed fieri sentio et excrucior.
In English this means:
I love and I hate. Perhaps you ask why I do this.
I do not know, but I feel it being done, and I am tortured.
Obviously I am having mixed emotions about my BJJ practice. How can I gain pleasure out of something that frightens me? How can something that seems insurmountable also at times be enjoyable?
I have decided to post a list of BJJ Loves and Hates that I will add to (maybe even cross out?) as my months progress.
Getting a heavy sweat on the gi
Cracking jokes with my partners
Staying in shape through the running-less winter
Being picked last for partners
Awkward eye contact during partner-picking time
Getting my face crushed
Please let me know your Loves and Hates about BJJ, too.
On Sunday I ordered my husband’s Christmas present to me: a new gi. I can’t possibly launder my lone gi between Monday and Wednesday. I need at least two if I’m going to adhere to proper standards of hygiene. I got the Fenom in white. Can’t beat the price and I really like how there are no patches all over it like I’m some kind of race car. I thought about getting the black with pink. I chose the white because I’m not sure if my class is ready for the pink statement. Best to keep under the radar with all that girlie stuff until I’m feeling much more comfortable. Then, watch out! Pink gi and painted toenails!